Schedule

So now I’m quietly writing my script.
It’s not very interesting,
but I rewrite it.
Often.

I crumple it and throw it away.
I sit down to think quietly
in “the time between”
(the writings and the crumplings)
and sit down again to write my script.
Though really I’m imagining I’m directing.
Then I crumple and quickly go out.

I walk on some paving stones
and listen to music.
I wonder why I’m limping slightly.
I sit down to drink water.
I watch the dog at the feet
of some woman.

I come back and sit down to write.
“Terms and Conditions of Website Use”.
I get up (but I can’t crumple them...)
I make myself an ikebana.
(No. I’m only imagining that.)
I translate two pages.

I feel like going out.
I go out. But only onto the terrace.
I come back. I read.
I stop reading.
I open my online banking.
I transfer money.
I check whether I’ve received money.
I drink water and listen to music.
40 times one song,
40 times one song, 40 times one song, 40 times.
Well, yeah. I liked it.
I take out the rubbish,
buy myself cigarettes and coffee.
I smoke and chat with the shop girl.
I explain to her the meaning of grammatical cases.
I sense I’m making a mistake
and describe the functions of the Accusative.
In German.

I come back and sit down to read a story.
Something... . I don’t feel like reading.
I sit down to write a chapter of another story.
But a couplet keeps spinning in my head from
an irregular sonnet. I don’t drink water and don’t write it down.

I watch an interview. 20 women explain how artificial men are. Now and then they play a man’s voice. No men take part.
Well, the absent are always in the wrong...

Then I watch an interview.
A girl explains on television
that she threw out her television more than a year ago.
Seriously.
And I watched it to the end.

I drink water. With pills. I go out.
I come back and sit down to write a job description.
I don’t finish it. I haven’t made it up yet.
I look for some music.
I remember the song and listen to it 80 times.

I create a database.
I look out of the window and optimise it.
I write down business logic.
I create business logic.
I look for logic in the business logic.
I drink water.
I fantasise about something fragrant.

I make a phone call.
I talk. I listen.
Then I sit down to drink water.
I review a server structure
and write three emails.
I send them and get up to walk about.
I limp and scratch myself.
I need to go to the dentist.
But I don’t feel like going, so I just scratch.

While rubbing my eyes I
try to drink water.
And choke, naturally.
I think of what the Japanese hold most precious.
Sleep.

But I don’t feel sleepy.
I write down a few lines.
I install four programs.
I recall medieval proverbs.
I play a computer game.
(The car needs its MOT).
But I don’t feel like going, and I don’t go.

I call and talk.
I drink water.
I don’t feel sleepy.
I sit down and write something.
I switch the radio on and off.
I pick up the phone. Twice.
I set up two business meetings.
And one out of curiosity.
I look at some façade.
I imagine I’m riding a bike.
I read, think, and look for logic in salvation through beauty.
I get up and go out.